Your guide to visiting LA

As someone who has hosted friends from all over the world in my humble apartment in the South Bay, I present to you some items you should consider before landing on our beautiful Southern California soil.

Just like your visa – jeans/flip flops/tshirt is a dress code that’s accepted everywhere.  Somehow everyone outside of LA has the idea that you have to be dressed for a club in Vegas to live out here.  Yes, you should if you’re being followed around by the paparazzi.  For the rest of us – ain’t no shame in the flip flop game.

If you arrive at LAX in February in shorts and a tank top we will laugh at you.  And you will be shivering. 

Yes, we do have a winter.  And no we don’t care that our winter temperature would be considered summer in Michigan.  That just makes us pity you.  We bundle up when it’s 60 degrees.  Get over it.

There is traffic on the 405 and we don’t have a public transportation system that rivals Boston/Chicago/NYC.  You’re going to have to be in a car while you’re out here.  Luckily unlike a train car, it will not be full of crackheads or businessmen looking for an excuse to “accidentally bump” their boner into you.  It will be full of your friends.  And if you are lucky your friends have a convertible.

On a clear day you can see the Hollywood sign from anywhere north of the 10.  Also, (drum roll please) it’s just a freaking sign.  Please don’t torture us by making us drive in extremely congested parts of LA so you can get even CLOSER to it.  (There is an exception if you’re willing to hike to it). 

Venice is not dangerous. I don’t know where this all started but a lot of out of towners are nervous about going there.  If you spend some time on Abbott Kinney you will get street cred with us.  If you complain that muscle beach is grimy then we will judge you because you are the a-hole that made us go there in the first place. 

We don’t have any desire to take you to whatever club that Lauren from “The Hills” frequents. 

It’s socially acceptable to start drinking at 9am.  Mimosa breakfast can easily turn into an all day drinking binge.  We’re ok with that.

If at the end of the trip you have a burning desire to move out here – you are not alone.  We all had “the first trip” and decided we’d do anything to stay out here.  Good luck on your mission to make that happen!